Google-What?

Today, I was listening to Elliot in the Morning as he was talking about how Google is named one of the best companies to work for and how shitty Clear Channel is.

(Side note: I used to work for Clear Channel and my department was right next to Elliot’s studio, and when I worked there was not a huge fan of Elliot. But now that I’ve left CC, I actually enjoy listening to his show. His laugh still grates on my nerves, and I get the chills every time he cackles, but I really do find his show amusing.)

Back to the story, so anyhoo, Fortune magazine named Google the number 1 place to work for. For the full story, click here. Elliot kept talking about the Googleplex, which is the name of their corporate office and how gigantic that place is and how it has anything and everything a person who works there could ever need. The Googleplex offers 11 different cafeterias, in house daycare, individual lap swimming pools, in house physicians and dental care, doggie daycares, in house masseuse, 24 hour help desk for hardware, hair salon and the list goes on. The Googleplex has so many freaking amenities; employees never want to leave there. And why would you, if you could take an hour break during the day to get a massage and then head back to your desk to tackle your next project. And mind you, all of this is free, its one of the perks for working there. Unfreakingbelievable.

How do I get a job there? I’m going to have to compete with the 1,300 resumes Google receives in a day. That’s 9,100 resumes a week, 39,000 resumes a month, and 474,500 resumes a year! Good lord, how do they weed out the real candidates from people like me who just want to chill out in the lounge and play pool all day?

It was hilarious listening to Elliot talk about Google and comparing it to Clear Channel. One of my favorite lines, “The only reason we were able to have a Christmas Party this year is because we promised Hard Rock Café that we’d air an hours worth of free commercials cause we’re too cheap to actually pay for one.” He had listeners call in who worked for Google and had a friend of a friend who worked there, saying that security around the Googleplex has tightened because Yahoo employees were sneaking in the cafeterias for some free lunch. How great is that.

Well I did hear that my company just bought a 46 million corporate jet. Perhaps the CEO will let me borrow it on the weekends. And for my friends who still work at CC, Elliot’s points were funny and valid, and I hate to admit that I agreed with him.