No More Repeats!

Will be my New Year’s theme. And by no more repeats, I will not repeat any behaviors or patterns that I consider to be unhealthy or unworthy.

No more repeats also means I will not go back to any of the men I dated or had relations with because I end up in a destructive cycle that does not move forward but continues to spin on repeat until I’m drowning in the abyss. I will only date new men and not going running back to old ones if the relationship fails. I no longer need that anchor that weighs me down and causes me not to give anyone else a real chance.

2008 is all about moving forward and letting go of unnecessary drama. I will try and learn from my mistakes from the past so that I won’t continue to fall into the same rut. If I see myself treading into destructive behaviors, I will stop and think about what triggers this in me and why do I feel it necessary to engage in such actions. I will not allow myself to get caught up in the same old shit as before and form more positive reactions.

Some other minor goals I’d like to accomplish this year:

- Decide on a career path for me. My last few jobs (including the current one I am in), I sorta just stumbled into them and while they have paid the bills and afforded me my lifestyle, they haven’t been my passion. I need to sit down and think about what I want to do as a career. And from there create a plan on how to get my dream job.

- Learn to curb my spending habits. I spend way too much money and need to rebuild my savings account. Currently I am living paycheck to paycheck and the Type A in me hates it. I need to get my finances back in order and start building up my nest egg. No more buying on a whim. I will only purchase items if I need it or have wanted it for some time and know that I will get good use out of it.

- Try not to take things to personally and let go of the little shit. “All the ifs, ands, onlys, and buts can’t change what is” – I read this once a long time ago and that was before I wrote down where I got it, so this will go marked as un-cited.

I know its only eight days into the New Year, but I feel very optimistic, which is quite unusual for me. I’m the biggest cynic you’ll ever meet, but for once I feel hopeful. As I’m writing this, I’m thinking my words will be biting me in the ass come end of year, but I’m keeping them up there to remind me and to not give up.